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Disarming The Narcissist

Surviving and Thriving with the Self-Absorbed

By Wendy T. Behary, Jeffrey Young, Daniel J. Siegel

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Format: Paperback, 184 pages
Published In: United States, 01 March 2008
Everyone knows a narcissist, one of those vainglorious individuals in desperate need of constant affirmation and attention. Cognitive therapist Behary's book argues that by modifying your own behavior, you can manage your relationship with such a person. Separating narcissism into categories (spoiled, dependent, deprived and combinations thereof) and exploring the causes of the disorder, the author hopes to assist the reader in overcoming the emotional obstacles involved in interaction with a boss, spouse, friend or relative. Rather than focus on changing the narcissist (which may be impossible), this book aims to help the reader improve self-knowledge to see why the narcissist pushes his or her buttons and how to cope. Some of the instruments Behary provides-such as checklists, flash cards, journal writing- are useful for determining the type of narcissist you are dealing with and how your past experiences affect your responses. The author acknowledges that her book is no panacea, and she doesn't present the reader with strategies for when the narcissist isn't responsive to the actions she has suggested. Notwithstanding this caveat, Behary's book will surely provide help to many in need of a confidence bolster in the face of provocation.

About the Author

Wendy T. Behary, LCSW, is founder and clinical director of the Cognitive Therapy Center of New Jersey and the NJ Institute for Schema Therapy. She is also a distinguished founding fellow of the Academy of Cognitive Therapy. She maintains a private practice, specializing in narcissism and high-conflict couples therapy. Preface writer Daniel J. Siegel, MD, is the author of The Mindful Brain, and an associate clinical professor at the UCLA School of Medicine Center for Human Development. Foreword writer Jeffrey Young, PhD, is the author of Schema Therapy, a Practitioner's Guide, and founder/director of the Schema Therapy Institute Schema Therapy Institute of NYC.

Reviews

"Behary is an exceptionally perceptive, compassionate, and creative clinician and an outstanding teacher. I have always found her immersed at the cutting edge of clinical science and practice. It has been both a privilege and an inspiration to watch her vision and clinical contributions evolve. These remarkable qualities are clearly evident in her new book, which I have no doubt will make a major contribution. It will bring anyone who deals with narcissism fully up to date with the latest our field has to offer, articulated in clear, poignant, and practical terms. " --George Lockwood, Ph.D., director of the Schema Therapy Institute Midwest in Kalamazoo, MI "For the practicing clinician there is perhaps no other group of clients more difficult to work with or that generates more fear and feelings of inadequacy than narcissists. In Disarming the Narcissist , Behary has provided both the theoretical knowledge and practical advice necessary for clinicians to understand, empathize and, thus, help this challenging group of clients and their partners. Her "disarmingly" straightforward, accessible style and impressive clinical experience make this a very valuable book indeed." --William M. Zangwill, Ph.D., director of EMDR Associates "This is a timely and important book. Wendy Behary offers a uniquely well-articulated exploration of the complexities of living with a narcissist, conveyed in a clear and elegant writing style. Disarming the Narcissist provides a treasure of insightful observations and strategies to help those working or living with a narcissist. Behary's wisdom and warm humanity, together with her wide understanding and successful integration of interpersonal neurobiology and schema therapy, provides a fresh perspective that will help the reader make sense of relationships that often seem so confusing and give them tools to do something about it. I recommend this book heartily. " --Marion F. Solomon, Ph.D., author of Narcissism and Intimacy and Lean on Me ..".a valuable contribution to the growing self-help literature on the fascinating subject of narcissism. Behary takes the reader step-by-step through a process of understanding our personal triggers to the wounding inherent in narcissistic relations and then lays out a pathway for personal empowerment and change." --Sandy Hotchkiss, LCSW, author of Why Is It Always About You? "Anyone whose life predicament includes dealing with a narcissist will bewell-advised to read Wendy Behary's book and heed her advice. Disarming theNarcissist offers sound suggestions and keen insights--a breakthrough in oneof psychology's toughest cases." --Daniel Goleman, author of Emotional Intelligence "Behary is an exceptionally perceptive, compassionate, and creative clinician and an outstanding teacher. I have always found her immersed at the cutting edge of clinical science and practice. It has been both a privilege and an inspiration to watch her vision and clinical contributions evolve. These remarkable qualities are clearly evident in her new book, which I have no doubt will make a major contribution. It will bring anyone who deals with narcissism fully up to date with the latest our field has to offer, articulated in clear, poignant, and practical terms. " George Lockwood, Ph.D., director of the Schema Therapy Institute Midwest in Kalamazoo, MI" "For the practicing clinician there is perhaps no other group of clients more difficult to work with or that generates more fear and feelings of inadequacy than narcissists. In Disarming the Narcissist, Behary has provided both the theoretical knowledge and practical advice necessary for clinicians to understand, empathize and, thus, help this challenging group of clients and their partners. Her disarmingly straightforward, accessible style and impressive clinical experience make this a very valuable book indeed." William M. Zangwill, Ph.D., director of EMDR Associates" "This is a timely and important book. Wendy Behary offers a uniquely well-articulated exploration of the complexities of living with a narcissist, conveyed in a clear and elegant writing style. Disarming the Narcissist provides a treasure of insightful observations and strategies to help those working or living with a narcissist. Behary s wisdom and warm humanity, together with her wide understanding and successful integration of interpersonal neurobiology and schema therapy, provides a fresh perspective that will help the reader make sense of relationships that often seem so confusing and give them tools to do something about it. I recommend this book heartily. " Marion F. Solomon, Ph.D., author of "Narcissism "and" Intimacy and Lean on Me"" ..".a valuable contribution to the growing self-help literature on the fascinating subject of narcissism. Behary takes the reader step-by-step through a process of understanding our personal triggers to the wounding inherent in narcissistic relations and then lays out a pathway for personal empowerment and change." Sandy Hotchkiss, LCSW, author of "Why Is It Always About You?"" "Anyone whose life predicament includes dealing with a narcissist will bewell-advised to read Wendy Behary s book and heed her advice. Disarming theNarcissist offers sound suggestions and keen insights a breakthrough in oneof psychology's toughest cases." Daniel Goleman, author of "Emotional Intelligence"" ."..a valuable contribution to the growing self-help literature on the fascinating subject of narcissism. Behary takes the reader step-by-step through a process of understanding our personal triggers to the wounding inherent in narcissistic relations and then lays out a pathway for personal empowerment and change."--Sandy Hotchkiss, LCSW, author of "Why Is It Always About You?"

EAN: 9781572245198
ISBN: 1572245190
Publisher: New Harbinger Publications
Dimensions: 23 x 15.4 x 1 centimetres (0.23 kg)
Age Range: 15+ years
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