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Everyday Parenting with Security and Love


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Table of Contents

Introduction. Section 1: Understanding challenges of parenting. 1. Blocked trust: I cannot believe you love me unconditionally. 2. Fear of the intersubjective relationship: I cannot let you influence me. 3. Shame: I need to hide from you. 4. Hidden and expressed attachment needs: I only feel safe when I hide as well as express my needs for support from you. Section 2: Therapeutic parenting. 5. Increasing the capacity to be mind-minded to support therapeutic parenting. 6. Building connections through parenting with PACE. 7. Parenting in the moment: Supporting behaviour through connection with correction. Section 3: Looking after yourself. 8. Learning from the past: understanding yourself through an exploration of your attachment history. 9. Blocked care: losing the joy in parenting. 10. Developing self-care. Reading list. Glossary.

Promotional Information

An introduction to parenting children from troubled emotional backgrounds

About the Author

Kim S. Golding CBE, BSc, MSc, D. Clin. Psy. AFBPsS is a clinical psychologist who works in Worcestershire, England where she was influential in the founding of the Integrated Service for Looked After Children - a multi-agency, holistic service providing support for foster, adoptive and residential parents, schools and the range of professionals supporting children growing up in care or in adoptive families. Kim was trained and mentored by Dan Hughes in the use of Dyadic Developmental Psychotherapy (DDP). She is on the board of the Dyadic Developmental Psychotherapy Institute supporting the use of DDP in Europe, USA and Canada. She accredits and trains professionals in the approach in the UK and has been invited to speak about this work internationally.


Kim offers us realistic and pragmatic strategies to care for our children that are grounded in the reality of our daily lives and our children's worldview. An essential read for parents of children who have experienced trauma, loss and separation. -- Al Coates, adoptive parent, Social Worker, Blogger at 'Misadventures of an Adoptive Dad' and podcaster
The use of practical examples and case studies enables therapeutic parents to apply the PACE model effectively. A must-have addition for all therapeutic parents' bookshelves! -- Sarah Naish, adoptive parent, CEO National Association of Therapeutic Parents and author of the Therapeutic Parenting children's series
In this important book, Dr Kim Golding provides us with the guidance needed to understand and develop relationships with children and youth who desperately need them in order to have success and joy in their lives. -- from the foreword by Dan Hughes, psychologist and founder of Dyadic Developmental Psychotherapy

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