JOSEPH BURGO, PH.D. has been practicing psychotherapy for more than 35 years. His articles and commentary have appeared in The New York Times, The Atlantic, The Washington Post,and other major publications. He also writes a blog on the topic of shame for Psychology Today and covers personal development issues from a psychodynamic perspective on his personal website, After Psychotherapy. He is the author ofWhy Do I Do That?andThe Narcissist You Know
"Joseph Burgo's Shame makes a convincing case for thinking of shame
as a whole "family of emotions" that we need to get to grips with
if we are to live meaningful and fulfilled lives. His is the best
kind of self-help book: wearing its considerable scholarship
lightly, it is sensible and measured, and is clearly based on years
of thought and clinical experience. Above all, it is helpful."--Joe
Moran, author of Shrinking Violets: The Secret Life of Shyness
"An essential read for anyone who suffers from shame and self
criticism. This book can help transform the way you see yourself
and the world."
--Shannon Kaiser best selling author of The Self-Love Experiment
and Adventures for Your Soul
"A powerful examination of a painful emotion. Based on his wide
experience as a psychotherapist, Burgo analyzes several types of
shame and gives examples of working through it. It's filled with
hope and ways to weather the storm of shame and actually grow from
it. It will help everyone, from those who experience occasional
shame attacks to those with chronic shame. I was particularly
encouraged to see the emphasis on self-esteem as something you
learn from your own success, rather than something others can give
you. Working with today's parents, I couldn't agree more." --Bill
Eddy, LCSW, Esq., Author of 5 Types of People Who Can Ruin Your
Life
"Dr. Burgo wants us to stop being ashamed of feeling Shame! His new
book illuminates the concept of shame as a normal part of life that
can be instructive, instead of toxic. Shame is an ubiquitous
emotion that must be recognized and understood, not denied and
buried. Dr. Burgo shares personal experiences and his work with his
patients to describe how shame can crush self-esteem and intensify
anxiety. This book describes exercises that can help you overcome
the harmful manifestations of experiencing shame and can provide
ways to use the emotion to build and share self-pride." --Jerold J.
Kreisman, M.D. author of I Hate You, Don't Leave Me
"Joseph Burgo has written the guidebook that will help you take the
shame out of shame. A thoughtful educator, he takes the
conversation of shame to the next level. Reminding us that shame is
an inevitable part of being human, he also shows us that shame can
play a vital role on the to road to self-esteem."-- Tama Kieves,
best-selling author of Thriving Through Uncertainty: Moving Beyond
Fear of the Unknown and Making Change Work for You
"Shame delivers on an unanswered prayer for so many who suffer
silently. The distinctions and layers of discovery about human
identity is a godsend. This book takes you deeper to understanding
not only yourself, but the make up of family and workplace dynamics
where shame is dispensed and consumed to a fault. Read this to shed
the burden of shame and be free!"-- Laura Berman Fortgang, author
of Now What?: 90 Days to a New Life Direction
"Dr. Joseph Burgo has written a powerful book which will be a boon
to readers everywhere. Drawing on cutting-edge research and
thirty-five years of experience as a therapist, he carefully builds
a case for why we need to move away from seeing shame as a single
and toxic emotion and, instead, understand it as a complex of
emotions which, counterintuitively, can help us embrace our true
selves and experience greater joy in living. Burgo is a fine
storyteller with great empathy, and the stories of patients (and,
yes, his own) vividly demonstrate how facing shame is the
well-spring of true respect and pride in the self. His argument is
by the far the most cogent in explaining why the notion of
self-esteem being founded in constant praise and lack of criticism
is both wrong-headed and ultimately destructive. Step by step,
Burgo shows us both how to give voice to the feelings of shame that
have been holding us back and to bolster our ability to identify
what we're feeling with precision. On every page, but especially in
the unique exercises at the end, Shame encourages us again and
again to look not just at what shames us but why it does and to
face both squarely. It's a book I will recommend to my readers
without a single reservation. "
--Peg Streep, author of Daughter Detox
"With the skill of a master storyteller, Burgo vividly brings to
life, through his clients' struggles and his own, our shared
journey to accept a startling truth: shame can either hobble us or
help us thrive; it all depends on what we do with it. Savor this
book's lessons and exercises. You'll come away with the kind of
self-compassion that makes us all better people. "-- Dr. Craig
Malkin, Lecturer, Harvard Medical School and author of the
internationally acclaimed book, Rethinking Narcissism
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