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Family Business on the Couch
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Table of Contents

Preface xiii

Acknowledgments xxv

Part I: Questions and Observations 1

Introduction 3

Endnote 7

1 A Psychological Perspective on Business Families 9

Psychodynamic and family systemic perspectives 10

Key ideas from the psychodynamic approach 11

The role of transference and countertransference 12

The family systemic perspective 17

A therapeutic alliance 20

A summing-up 21

Endnotes 22

2 The Challenges of Love and Work 25

Conflicting goals in the family business 26

The three-circles model 29

How conflict can develop 32

Endnotes 38

3 Family Business Practices: Assessing Strengths and Weaknesses 39

The interface of business and family practices 42

Assessing the health of a family business 60

Endnotes 62

Part II: Reflection and Learning 63

4 the Life Cycle as An Organizing Construct 65

The multiple life cycles of the family business 66

Key models of human psychological development 68

The family life cycle 75

Carter and McGoldrick’s family-based life cycle model 76

Applying the life cycle in family businesses 78

Endnotes 81

5 Narcissism, Envy, and Myths In Family Firms 83

Personality types 83

Managerial implications of dysfunctional narcissism 90

The importance of individuation 91

The family firm as transitional object 92

The power of envy 95

Games families play: the role of family myths 103

The impact of family myths on the family business 105

Summary 109

Endnotes 109

6 the Entrepreneur: Alone at the Top 111

Common personality characteristics of founder–entrepreneurs 111

Larry Ellison and Oracle 113

Deciphering the inner theater of the entrepreneur 117

Common defensive structures in founder–entrepreneurs 128

Maintaining the balance 130

Endnotes 131

7 Leadership Transition: Replacing a Parent as Ceo 133

Options for tackling the succession problem 133

The inheritance 135

Psychological pressures on new leaders 136

Staying on course 144

Endnotes 146

8 A Systemic View of the Business Family 147

A two-way relationship 147

The evolution of systems theory 148

The development of family systems theory 149

The family systems proposition 154

Family scripts and rules 156

Family scripts in the family business 157

A practical example of family systems thinking 162

Endnotes 163

9 Diagnosing Family Entanglements 165

The family genogram 166

The Circumplex Model of marriage and family systems 172

Differentiation of self from family of origin 176

Two family stories 178

Endnotes 185

Part III: Integration and Action 187

10 Addressing Transitions and Change 189

Lewin’s ideas on change 189

A model of individual change 191

Major themes in the individual journey toward change 196

The process of change within organizations 200

The change process in families 205

Family focus or organization focus? 212

Endnotes 213

11 The Vicissitudes of Family Business 215

The Steinbergs: A study in self-destruction 215

The immigrant dream 216

His mother’s son 218

The entrepreneur’s vision 220

Sam as a family business leader 220

The entrepreneur’s dilemma: Passing the baton 223

The next generation 224

Irving Ludmer: Play it again, Sam 225

A family systems perspective on the Steinbergs 228

The effects of Sam Steinberg’s inner world on the family business 233

The inner theater of Sam’s daughters 236

What if? 239

Endnotes 240

12 Putting Family Business Intervention Into Practice 241

The Family Action Research Process 242

The succession conundrum 243

The role of the outside adviser 271

Advice to families seeking help 271

The benefits of a psychodynamic systems perspective 274

Final words 275

Endnotes 276

Appendix 1: Developing a Business Family Genogram 277

Creating the genogram 277

Therapeutic applications of the genogram 278

Using the genogram to identify family scripts and themes 279

How genograms improve communication 282

Endnote 282

Appendix 2: the Clinical Rating Scales And the Circumplex Model 283

How the CRS work 284

Endnote 287

Index 289

About the Author

MANFRED F.R. KETS DE VRIES brings a unique perspective to the much-studied subjects of leadership and the dynamics of individual and organizational change. He is a clinical professor of leadership development and holds the Raoul de Vitry d’Avaucourt Chair of Leadership Development at INSEAD, France & Singapore. He is also the Director of INSEAD’s Global Leadership Center. He has held professorships at McGill University, the Ecole des Hautes Etudes Commerciales, Montreal, and the Harvard Business School, and he has lectured at management institutions around the world. He is a founding member of the International Society for the Psychoanalytic Study of Organizations. The Financial Times, Le Capital, Wirtschaftswoche, and The Economist have rated Manfred Kets de Vries among the world’s top fifty thinkers on management and among the world’s most influential people in human resource management.

He is the author, co-author, or editor of more than 24 books and over 250 scientific papers as chapters in books and as articles. His books and articles have been translated into more than 25 languages. He was also the first non-American recipient of the International Leadership Award for “his contributions to the classroom and the board room.”

Kets de Vries is a consultant on organizational design/transformation and strategic human resource management to leading US, Canadian, European, African, Australian and Asian companies. As an educator and consultant he has worked in more than forty countries.

DR. RANDEL S. CARLOCK is the first Berghmans Lhoist Chaired Professor in Entrepreneurial Leadership, the founding Director of the Wendel International Centre for Family Enterprise and a founding board member of the Global Leadership Centre at INSEAD. Previously he was the first Opus Professor of Family Enterprise and founder of the family business center at the University of St. Thomas in Minneapolis, MN (USA). Carlock has an MA in education and training (1976), an MBA in strategic management (1983), and a Ph.D. (1991), all from the University of Minnesota. His doctoral dissertation explored the role of organization development in managing high growth entrepreneurial firms. He has also completed a post graduate certification in family and marriage therapy at the Institute of Psychiatry, King’s College, University of London (1998) and a certificate in psychodynamic counseling at Birkbeck College, University of London (1999). He was awarded a Certificate in Family Business Advising with Fellow Status (2001) by The Family Firm Institute, Boston, MA (USA).

He is the author of several books, articles, book chapters, videos and case studies. He has over 25 years of experience serving as an executive with a global family business and as CEO and chairman of his own NASDAQ listed corporation. He currently advises global business families and corporations around the world specializing in Asia, Europe and the Middle East.

ELIZABETH FLORENT-TREACY, Research Project Manager at INSEAD, Fontainebleau, France, and Singapore, She works in the INSEAD Global Leadership Centre, and the Wendel International Centre for Family Enterprise. She has conducted research in the following areas: global leadership; global organizations; corporate culture in European and global organizations; American, French and Russian business practices; family business issues (governance, succession, strategy); entrepreneurial leadership; cross-cultural management; women and global leadership; cultural aspects of mergers and acquisitions; transformational leadership; expatriate executives and families; and the psychodynamics of leadership. She holds degrees in Sociology (BA) and Organization Development (MA).

Elizabeth has written authored or co-authored 4 books, 21 articles, working papers and book chapters and 18 case studies on leadership and family business topics.

Reviews

“…explores the reasons why some family businesses are dysfunctional – and how to cure them.” (The Guardian, Saturday 15th September 2007) "fascinating new book" (The Independent, Tuesday 9th October 2007) "a unique insight into the subject." (Guardian Unlimited guardian.co.uk, Thursday 13th December) "You'll find this book well worth reading" (Edge, February 2008) "...an insight into addressing key family buisness issues." (Gulf Buisness, February 2008)

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