Table of Contents

Preface ix
1 Body Parts


Who Has What and How It Works 1


#1 Bigger Penises Are Better 1


#2 Vaginas Are Dirty, Ugly, and Smell Bad 6


#3 Male Circumcision Is Dangerous and Completely Unnecessary 14


#4 The G-spot Is the Most Orgasmic Part of a Woman’s Body 22


#5 Testosterone Is the Main Predictor of Sex Drive in Men, and You Can Always Add More 26


#6 Everyone Is Born Either Male or Female 31


2 Orientation and Identity


Who We Are and Who We Want 41


#7 You Can Tell If Someone Is Gay Just by Looking at Him/Her 41


#8 No One Is Really Bisexual 44


#9 Most Transgender Individuals Get Surgery 49


#10 Homosexuality Can Be Cured 55


#11 Same-Sex Relationships Are Inherently Different from Those Between One Man and One Woman 64


#12 Children of Same-Sex Parents Have Psychological Issues and Usually End Up Gay 69


#13 Most Child Molesters Are Gay Men 77


3 Sexual Stats


Who Has Sex? How Often? How Hot? 83


#14 Single People Have the Best Sex Life Since They’re Not Tied Down 83


#15 Married Sex Is Boring, and Boring Sex Is Bad 87


#16 Grandma Doesn’t Have Sex (and I Doubt that Mom Does Either) 91


#17 Young People Are Sexually Wild, Promiscuous, and Irresponsible 97


#18 Anal Sex is Not Normal 102


4 Performance


Lights, Camera, Orgasm 110


#19 The First Time You Have Sex Is One of the Best and Most Meaningful Events of Your Life 110


#20 Good Sex Always Ends With Simultaneous Orgasms 117


#21 No Partner of Mine Has Ever Faked an Orgasm 123


#22 Women Want to Be Dominated in Bed, Rough Sex Is the Most Fun 126


#23 Only People Who Aren’t Getting Any Masturbate 129


#24 Not Horny? Horny Goat Weed Can Help 132


5 Conception and Contraception


Illusions and Delusions 137


#25 She’s Not Going to Get Pregnant if We Just Do It This Once 137


#26 The Pill and Other Birth Control Methods are Actually Dangerous to a Woman’s Health 141


#27 Withdrawal Is Just as Good as Any Other Contraceptive Method 151


#28 Condoms Don’t Work Very Well, Plus They Take All the Fun Out of Sex Anyway 156


#29 Abortion Causes Breast Cancer and a Host of Mental Health Issues 162


6 STIs and Protection


The Risks of Romance 167


#30 There’s a Cure for HIV and AIDS 167


#31 STIs Are No Big Deal as Long as You Take Your Medicine 174


#32 HPV Vaccines (and Other Prevention Methods) Turn Girls into Sluts 183


7 Relationships


Dating and Desire 190


#33 Hooking Up Never Leads to a Relationship 190


#34 If You Feel Attracted to Someone Else, There Must Be Something Wrong With Your Relationship 194


#35 Most Female Fantasies Revolve Around a Love Story 196


#36 Men Cheat, Women Rarely Do 203


#37 Most Couples have Matched Sexual Appetites 211


8 When Sex is Unhealthy


Sex and Trouble 216


#38 Jealousy Is Romantic 216


#39 Alcohol Makes Sex Better 220


#40 Alcohol and Sex Are a Harmless Combination 225


#41 For Girls, Sometimes Sex Just Hurts 229


#42 Men Under 40 Rarely Have Trouble With Erections 234


#43 People Can Get Addicted to Sex, Just Like They’re Addicted to Alcohol or Drugs 241


#44 She Was Asking For It, and Other Common Myths About Sexual Assault 248


#45 Pornography Is Dangerous 253


9 The Not-So-Private Side of Sex


Sex, Society, and the Law 262


#46 Sex Education Makes Kids More Sexually Active 262


#47 Men Who Have a Lot of Sex Are Studs, Women Are Sluts 270


#48 Sexting is a Dangerous Epidemic Among Teens 276


#49 If Sex Is Consensual, It Can Never Be Illegal 283


#50 The Struggle for Gay Rights Is Over 292


Index 301

About the Author

Pepper Schwartz is Professor of Sociology at theUniversity of Washington. She is also Senior Fellow on the Councilon the Contemporary Family, on the board of the University ofMinnesota Sexual Health Center, and Chairperson of the AdvisoryBoard for the Ph.D. in Sexual Studies at the Institute for IntegralStudies in San Francisco. She is the author of 20 books, includingThe Getaway Guide to a Great Sex Weekend (2012), TheNormal Bar: The Surprising Secrets of Happy Couples (2013) andDating After 50 for Dummies (Wiley 2014). She is therecipient of numerous national awards and Past President of TheSociety for the Scientific Study of Sexuality. Martha Kempner is a writer, consultant, and sexual healthexpert. She has authored numerous publications for youngpeople, parents, educators, and policymakers, and currently servesas the staff writer focused on sexual health for RH Reality Check,an online news source dedicated to reproductive health and rights.Martha has a Masters degree in human sexuality from New YorkUniversity.